I often ask my clients to read the book Being Happy! A Handbook to Greater Confidence & Security by Andrew Matthews. It is a juicy little book with great illustrations and one that provides simple, yet sage advice. So often, we think this “spiritual” stuff has to be hard work. If we work in a hospital or medical profession and have to keep notes on our clients/patients, we are often taught to do SOAP notes – “subjective, objective, assessment and plan.” But the acronym that I really like and that keeps me lighthearted is: KISS – “keep it simple, stupid.”

Matthew's states: “All you have is now. The measure of our peace of mind and the measure of our personal effectiveness are determined by how much we are able to live in the present moment. Regardless of what happened yesterday and what might happen tomorrow, now is where you are. From this point of view, the key to happiness and contentment must be in focusing our minds on the present moment!” But where do most of us live? About 40 miles off into the future. We want security, we want to know that all of our creature comforts will always be there and we don’t like anything that will rock that boat.

I agree with you I don’t like change all that much either unless I’m the one who instigates it. But does change knock on our door and ask, “Do you think this or that would be OK with you?” Does change wait for our permission? And does it (ouch!) care whether we like it or not? So how do we remain happy, in a peaceful place when we don’t know what is coming around the corner?

How many times have we heard “peace is an inside job?” Let’s break that open and really look at it together. A Course In Miracles, the Kabbalah and Buddhism assert that thoughts are held in our minds and then projected outward. I then look outside of me and find things that support my already held (within) beliefs and then judge the circumstance outside of me by saying “yes” it supports my view or “no” it doesn’t. Lesson 34 of A Course In Miracles states: “I could see peace instead of this. ‘The idea for today begins to describe the conditions that prevail in the other way of seeing. Peace of mind is clearly an internal matter. It must begin with your own thoughts and then extend outward. It is from your peace of mind that a peaceful perception of the world arises.’”

So this starts by me examining what thoughts I am holding about any given situation and asking myself, does it make me happy to think this way or not. We are programmed to believe that what is outside of us determines our happiness quotient, but just the opposite is true. Matthews goes on to say: “Your mind is a magnet and you attract what you think about... When my attention was first drawn to this, I thought, ‘What a lot of garbage. How could my mind possibly attract, produce or manifest anything?’ However, I thought the matter was worthy of further investigation on the off-chance that some other screwballs might subscribe to the same theory. Just in case it was actually true that our mind does attract things, I didn’t want to be the pitiful individual who spent a whole life in struggle due to his own ignorance. I went out and bought myself some books on the mind; some scientific, some metaphysical, some spiritual, some about getting rich. To my surprise, each of the volumes I bought came to similar conclusions regarding the magnetic nature of the human mind. Coincidence, I thought. I bought some more books and then some more. I read about 200. They were written by various authors from all over the world in different times and by people of different religious and philosophical persuasions. They all said basically the same thing – ‘You attract what you hold in your mind. Your mind is a magnet.’”

We all deserve happiness, but nobody is going to get it for us – except us. That’s great because that means my ability to be happy is not contingent upon anything you do or don’t do. The power of my happiness quotient is with me. Yes, that is where it needs to be. We need to stop and ask ourselves when we are holding a thought that doesn’t produce joy, do I want to keep thinking this way? What is it getting for me? How is this thought helping my life? How is it bringing to me (like a magnet – like attracts like) what I really want? A Course In Miracles tells us that a miracle is a shift in perception (in other words, moving to a different thought than the one I’m currently holding) and we can ask our Higher Power, however that is defined for us, for help in changing our minds and bringing ourselves back to a happier place. True it isn’t always easy and yes, it does take practice, but as we make a conscious decision to raise the bar on our happiness quotient, we are in control of changing our vibration and bringing to us what is truly our heart’s desire.

I love this quote from Dale Carnegie, author of How to Stop Worrying and Start Living: “One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon instead of enjoying the roses blooming outside our windows today.” So let’s make a deal together to bloom where we are planted and watch our happiness quotient go up like a hot air balloon.

Diane Michele, PhD is a psychotherapist, teacher and trainer in Birmingham. She has an MA in Counseling and a PhD in Metaphysics. She is a National Board Certified Diplomat in Clinical Hypnotherapy, a Certified Social Worker/Licensed Professional Counselor and a student of A Course In Miracles. Diane can be reached at (248) 375-3642.