Every circumstance provides us with the opportunity for deepening our compassion and loving ourselves and others. Whenever we are open to recognizing the light-filled message in our experiences, we open up new vistas for receiving truth. Logotherapy is a profound example of how we can reframe our painful experiences so the inherent lesson may be captured. "Logos" means truth and through Logotherapy any difficulty can be used as a transformative tool for expanding the heart.

Logotherapy was first brought to my attention while reading a story about a woman who saw her four-year-old daughter get hit by a car. Horrified, she ran into the road and swept the child into her arms, comforting her until she died. The vision of this event plagued the mother for many years. She couldn’t get the image of her bleeding daughter out of her mind. But Logotherapy, based on the belief in “...God and His desire for healing in our lives...” taught the mother how to reinterpret the situation. The grieving woman found solace in a new vision which emphasized how beautiful it was for her child to die in her arms. Her daughter was able to see her mother’s loving face while leaving this world. What more soothing way for her child to depart from this earth than in the loving arms of her mother?

We can ask ourselves, “Is there another way to view this situation?” “What can I learn from this?” “How can I soften and open my heart as a result of this circumstance?” Our past experiences only serve a purpose to the extent that we learn from them. Feeling shame over former relationships, jobs or recurring experiences casts a deceptive darkness or what Carl Jung referred to as a “Shadow” over our essential self. God does not judge our past experiences, we judge our experiences and then feel guilty for having had them. Yet anything we go through can be used on behalf of the greater unfolding of humankind.

Barry Kaufman, speaker and writer on making “love a choice” devotes his life to helping others embrace love amidst the confusion of life’s challenges. He embarked on this benevolent venture after his son was diagnosed as autistic, “... hopeless, unreachable, a tragedy.” Yet the Kaufmans chose to keep their hearts open and to see their son as “brain blessed.” Abundant with love, they poured their hearts reservoir onto their son and ignored the dismal feedback from medical experts. In 1995, their son graduated with honors in biomedical ethics from an Ivy League college. Over the years, the Kaufman’s choice to view obstacles as gifts has empowered thousands of people who have been faced with “challenging opportunities.”

Our biggest challenges provide us with a means for serving others. Some of the world’s greatest leaders and saints have undergone crisis or trauma in their own lives and have grown as a result of their challenges. Abraham Lincoln lost eight elections, declared bankruptcy twice and had a nervous breakdown between the age of 31 and 58 – all before he was ever elected President! No one understands another person’s pain and can best support them than someone who has been there. That’s why recovering alcoholics are the best champions for those entering recovery. In the book, You Can Heal Your Life, Louise Hay asserts, “It is my opinion that many really good teachers do not come from joyful households where all is easy. They come from a place of much pain and suffering and they’ve worked through the layers to reach the place where they can now help others to become free.”

At one time I was confused about many of my childhood experiences. Pain and conflict arose from having had a mother who was ill most of her life. It took considerable emotional and spiritual healing for me to recognize the incredible strength my background provided. Today, I can clearly see that any difficulty has only deepened my ability to be compassionate, forgiving and to be of service to others. Truly, how can we genuinely be fully present for someone if we haven’t remained open to our own feelings? I know people who avoid other people’s suffering because of their unwillingness to deal with their own pain and likewise, I know people who are emotionally available to others despite the amount of anguish in the circumstance. And because of their willingness to transmute their life’s pain into a healing force, the latter are truly angels in disguise

True vision means having the willingness to see your life experiences through eyes anew. Below are steps for achieving clarity, acceptance and self-love:

1. Instead of judging your past experiences, consider how they have helped you get to this point. Keep in mind that everything we experience is either love or a call for love.

2. Think of a situation you have been struggling with or are having difficulty releasing. What life-changing lessons can you glean from it? Compassion? Sensitivity? Forgiveness? Self-appreciation? What are they? Remember, your difficulties are blessings in disguise. You only remain a victim of your circumstances to the extent that you’re not aware of the purpose they serve in your life.

3. Remind yourself, daily, that every circumstance is an opportunity for opening your heart.

Allow your mind to run free and be willing to see your challenges in a new light. Shift your thought patterns and your attitude will change accordingly and as your attitude shifts, your circumstances will improve as well. I once read, "Attitude is the mind’s paintbrush. It can color any situation." Since God is the Grand Artist, She will illustrate your lessons in a way which reveals the inherent beauty lying within each and every one.

Laura V. Hyde is the Spiritual Leader of the Unity Church of Five Cities in Central Coast California, a national author and speaker. Laura does spiritual counseling, is the author of “Gifts of the Soul” and “The Intimate Soul,” a facilitator of “A Course in Miracles” and the host of a show on Public Television. www.laurahyde.com